28.

Thats right, i turned 28 on Dec. 17. Wow it feels great, I guess it is true that when you turn 30 you grow into an adult. Anyway i had a blast on my birthday. When i came home David and yoel had balloons and gifts waiting for me with a cake. Although i was fasting and couldn't eat the nice strawberry shortcake i loved to look at it. Marty gave me a jacket which is really expensive, i can tell by the quality and warmth it brings me. David got me a camera which is soo cool but i have to learn all the tricks to it. And of course Yoel, i was wondering what he will give me for my birthday. He got some of my friends to send me videos from Texas and Israel wishing me a Happy birthday. It was a true highlight, i had tears in my eyes and that was my first experience ever crying over happiness. I guess i didn't realize how much people really do care about me and could take that extra mile to just make a video and wish me all the best. I truly loved that. But that wasn't the gift, that was just the icing on the cake. What i really got was a ticket to go Skydiving! Thats right. No more, oh its so cool i have to try it. Now its more about you are GOING skydiving... will i chicken out? hmm i don't know sometimes i feel like i will and sometimes i am strong... army strong.

I also had a nice shabbat dinner with great people and they sure kept me entertained. This is great. To feel like someone is out there caring for you on your special day is the best time ever...

Good times..

Happy Hanukah

It's that time again to take out those deridels and Menorahs and start your lighting party..



That’s right Hanukah!! yeyeyeyey!!!!!!!!!! Seriously every year that December comes around I feel the love. Maybe it’s because my birthday falls on December? Or maybe it’s because everyone is such in a great mood? You know being the “holiday season".. Well whatever it is I looooovvvveee Hanukah!!! I can't wait to eat my first donut tonight. I haven't ate much of donuts in a while, well I sneaked one in last week...shhhh..

Lighting the Hanukia is the best feeling ever! Oh and afterwards women are suppose to rest and let the guy do everything? Ha can't wait for that one at my house hold. It's been quite sometimes since I wrote on my blog in a personal note.

This year has been very challenging! It all started last year when I turned 27, I cried my whole birthday ( I know). Now I wish I was turning 27! Well not really, I am kind of excited about hitting the #30! Then I think about it, once I hit 30 what will be of this blog because its suppose to be my journey to age 30!? Sooo... That’s right; I will be ending this blog for good. Keep in touch because there might be a special surprise! Okay going back to my challenging year. Yes, it’s been really hard and although I would like to keep some of my life personal, I want to say that I have met some really great people this year.


I have laughed, cried and danced through miracles after miracles. Things could have always been worse and they came out for what it was suppose to be. So I hope you all reflect on how many miracles you had this year through your lives and remember things could have been worse. You could have not gotten the chance to smile with that someone, cry with that someone or dance with that someone.

Tonight we begin the remembrance of the miracles in the past and look forward to miracles in the future. I want to wish you all a Happy Hanukah and enjoy those donuts! One jelly at a time!


Dreidel- Dreidel - Dreidel- I made you out of clay and when your dry and ready oh dreidel I shall play.

To be forgiven is to free your soul.

Heaven and Earth are connected just like the sun and the moon, the sky and the clouds so to the soul and peace. When a person is angry at someone they tend to bring bad energy to those around them, hating someone is like killing one self’s soul.



Often times we hurt others with out knowing the pain existed. Even though sometimes it’s not our fault we are guilty. This is why it’s so extremely important to be careful with whatever flows out of our swords. Not always do we hurt from our mouths it’s also an action that causes pain. When we know that we hurt others we tend to be supportive of our selves about why we said what we said or did what we did but when we are alone our actions tend to follow us. We then suddenly feel bad of what we have done and embarrassed that we did it. Justifying our selves for what we have done doesn’t heal no pain from with in you and the person.


99% of us have offended more then 1 person in our life time which means we have all cause anger and sorrow to others but we expect to be treated differently. People like to judge and offend others but when the story turns around the person is very offensive. Why do we do this to each other? Shouldn’t we try to live in peace? Why are you hunting my soul? And why am I hunting yours? We all of a sudden start feeling down about our personality but hey it’s not your personality your hurting its your soul. I have met the sweetest people in my life time and yet the punch lines come out of their mouths like fire.


There are those times when people just don’t accept us for who we are no matter how much we try to get them to like us they just don’t. And you cry and you ask GOD why am I not accepted? But you are accepted, the problem is not you it’s the person who doesn’t want to accept you for who you are or the status of the person that you are. Those people can go around accepting forgiveness but at most times won’t dare to ask to be forgiven. You person who is judgmental why would you think GOD will bless you when you broke someone’s soul? How far can you go with a tortured soul? How much pain can you cause to those people who are trying to be a friend? But wait a second, think out side the box we are that entire person! We don’t seem to realize it because we are always thinking to good of our selves. Maybe if we put out the fire from the dragons tongue we won’t get smite?


Every year in the Jewish New Year Jewish people ask for forgiveness to each other and most of the times they are forgiven but are they? It’s easy to say “I’m sorry or forgive me” but most of the time by that time people forget what they are forgiving and the soul never escapes to freedom. Forgiveness is such a powerful word, could you imagine Israelis and Palestinians forgiving each other? victim and murder? What if we forgave our neighbors? Would that bring our selves to world peace?


To forgive is to Repent and to repent is admitting ones guilt and to admitting ones guilt is to free the soul.


So, next time when you decide to be who you are and no one will change you, don’t complain that people treat you bad, don’t complain that you are disrespected because you do the same to others that’s why they do on to you.


Feeling like I am talking to you? Don’t beat your self for it, for I am this way to and so is the reader. Want to think about your self? Forgive your self; give peace to your self and when you ask for forgiveness free your soul.

Why????? joke

Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?

Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?


Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

Why is a boxing ring square?

Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?

Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?

Why is it that to stop Windows 95 or 98, you have to click on "Start"?

Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavour, and dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why is the word dictionary in the dictionary?

Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?



You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes? Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?

Why do you need a driver's license to buy booze when you can't drink and drive?

Why isn't there mouse-flavoured cat food?


Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?


If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?

Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?

Tisha B' Av ( the nine of Av) in History

Today is a mourning day for the Jewish people all across the earth. They are mourning the destruction of the first and second temple. Why morn something that happened 2000 years ago?  To answer this question we have to go back in history to find the answer to that ‘Why’ question.

The First Temple was built by King Solomon and was the most important place in ancient Judaism. Who was King Solomon?

Solomon (approximately 970-928 BCE), the second son of King David and Bathsheba, remember them? King David, the King of Israel and all man kind for that matter. If you are Jewish, Muslim or Christian I am sure you have heard of King David. Most of the information and history from King Solomon is in Kings I and Chronicles II. 

King Solomon was a very wise person. A famous story came about to supporting that wisdom when two women came to his court, each claiming that she was the mother of the same baby. Solomon threatened to split the baby in half. One woman was prepared to accept the decision, but the other begged the King to give the live baby to the other woman. Solomon then knew the second woman was the mother.

King Solomon was a builder and built many historical building but the most famous of all was the First Temple in Jerusalem, Israel. The Temple took seven years to complete. It was built of stone and cedar, carved within and overlaid with pure gold.

The question is why did King Solomon build the first temple? His father, King David, had wanted to build a great Temple for God a generation earlier, as a permanent resting place for the Ark containing the Ten Commandments . A divine edict, however, had forbidden him from doing so. "You will not build a house for My name," God said to him, "for you are a man of battles and have shed blood" 

I Chronicles 28:3 

We all know that King David was a great fighter I mean a small person taking down a giant is no joke; I wouldn’t want to meet him in a small alley.  (Just saying) Okay back to History… 

So this temple was created for people to go and worship GD which is something that was commanded to do. Times were so different back then that they were today. But I am sure I don’t have to break down the facts supporting the time changes.  Why was this holy temple destroyed? The temple where Jews and non-Jewish for that matter prayed and gave sacrifice to Gd. And who destroyed this temple?

In history it is said that the first temple was destroyed by the Babylonians, some four hundred years after it was built. The who?

Yeah I know...

The Babylonians was an ancient cultural region in central-southern Mesopotamia (present-day Iraq) with Babylon as its capital. Okay so now that we know where the Babylonians came from now the same questions arises why did they destroy the first temple?

The destruction of Jerusalem at the hands of King Nebuchadnezzar of Babylon is one of the epochal moments in Jewish history. This was king Jehoiakim kingdom at the time which later became his son Prince Zedekiah's kingdom shortly after his father’s death.  

Yet the events as they unfolded were by no means inevitable, and were mainly brought about by the ill-considered choices of Jerusalem’s rulers. Therefore today’s Jews view the destruction of the First Temple as a punishment from God.

 Many myths and tales surround the figure of Nebuchadnezzar, conqueror of Jerusalem and destroyer of the First Temple. One of these is that one night, during the peak of his reign, the king of Babylon dreamed of a statue with a golden head, silver shoulders and chest, copper torso and thighs, and calves and feet of iron. Sounds to me that someone was being a little greedy?

  During that destruction it was bad; I mean people were being murdered!  Women and children were being rapped. Once inside, the Babylonians utterly destroyed the city of Jerusalem and the First Temple, taking all who remained into exile. The siege itself is chronicled as a time of deep horror, when hunger drove people to terrible acts.

Meanwhile, attempting to escape, Zedekiah fled through a secret passage from his palace to a location outside the city walls. But he was captured by Babylonian soldiers, and forced to witness the execution of his whole family before he himself was blinded.  

70 years later after that horrific massacre a Second Temple was rebuild and Prayers and Scarify to GD were once again being made.

King Herod better known as Herod the Great build back Jerusalem and the Second Temple although he was not a favored man by many. He converted to Judaism but he was not following the laws and acts of a religious Jewish person. It is known at one point in his life he murdered his whole family. Herod the great had many wives and many children. As an old man he broke down with sickness and grief. He suffered from dropsy, ulcers, convulsions, and probably cancer. He died at the age of 69 hated by all his people. It was said of him that he stole to the throne like a fox, ruled like a tiger, and died like a dog.

10 years later after King Herod’s death the Romans wanted to take over Jerusalem.

 At the time there were Jewish revolts who wanted to protect their land. Emperor Titus was victorious and succeeded to bringing down Jerusalem 70 CE. The total destruction of Jerusalem and the Second Temple was catastrophic for the Jewish people. According to the contemporary historian Josephus Flavius, hundreds of thousands of Jews perished in the siege of Jerusalem and elsewhere in the country, and many thousands more were sold into slavery.

Now going back to King Herod the Great. The king knew that he needed a hiding place to be built incase a great revolt came against him, so he build this place in Israel named Masada. This was going to be his escape where it was almost impossible for the enemy to reach.


During the down fall of Jerusalem when the Romans were killing every person in sight there was a group of 1000 Jewish extremist called Sicarii the word meaning dagger or contract- killer. They didn’t want to go with out a fight and they would never dare to surrender to the Romans to have their loved ones rapped and killed. When the Roman Empire caught up to Masada and the Jewish extremist saw that there was no way out they committed suicide by jumping down the cliff which was 1,300 feet high. Women and child, husband and wife and elders all perished that day.

The account of the siege from Masada were later reported by two women who survived the great suicide by hiding out with five children as it is stated that committing suicide is against Jewish law. Some say the people killed one another so that they wouldn’t disrespect the law of committing suicide but whatever it might be the lost was great.

Because of these acts of destroying the holy temples and because of all those people that perished today is a day of mourning for the Jewish people.

 We fast and we cry and remember all those destroyed and pray that one day we can rebuild the third temple that will be following the end of time.

 

Don't Forget me...

 Sirens were blown across the Israeli Country today marking the anniversary of the Holocaust. My first time being in Israel when the sirens were whooing like there was a war I was shocked how many people stopped what they were doing and stood still out of respect for all those 6 Million Jews that were murdered. I was on my way to the airport and I couldn't believe how everyone stops there lives that very moment to remember those that have perished. As I had closed my eyes trying to put my self in that position the Jews were in, i just couldn't. It’s so unreal, and I can't even imagine how bad it was. Today marks another anniversary of WW2.

We heard the stories of different survivors, we tend to forget after a while but they never do. 65 years since the war has ended and those survivors still have nightmares and have fear of taking showers because it reminds them of the gas chambers.

Others hoard meat in pillow cases because they fear going hungry. Today is the only day that we can somewhat try to freeze time and imagine what it must have been like. It's terrible what happened to all those Jewish people, they were just like you and me with personal lives, with problems with dreams. These people were so hungry for just a drink of water! Does it make since that their are people like the nazi in this world?? If it was you who lived in those ghettos would u survive the starvation, raping, murdered, spits, punches, kicks, experiments?

Lots of survivors ended up in Mental hospitals with no one to watch over them and every night they wake up with screams "the nazis are coming". These are the forgotten people, we read in our history books and we meet survivors that tell us their stories but when we go home we forget. Why would they want to tell us? Why would they want to live it over and over again? Would that give them closure? Why do they want us to know so badly? And the only answer I come up with is that they don't want to be forgotten.

Remember me when you complain of your hard life, remember me when you are surrounded by your loved ones, remember me when you eat your bread and when you sleep so peacefully. Remember me when you add a pair of shoes to your 100 collections, remember me when you are sitting next to your lover, remember me when your children tell you I love you. For I am forgotten, I sit hear alone counting the days when i will no longer remember the pain and sorrow. Please don't forget me for I was treated like a dog when i could barley speak, treated like a rat when I could barely eat, beaten almost to death for just wanting to drink. I sit here in silence and my time has froze, only my body ages but my memory is fresh. As much as I want to forget, you don't forget me.

27 YEARS... ITS BEEN A WHILE

It's been a while since i wrote on my blog and realized how much i have been missing.

As you can see with the title up above i am no longer 26 :( It feels like your life goes down hill by age 25!

Since I last wrote on this blog about a year ago ( i know I'm so bad!) LOTS of things have changed. I got a new job that i have been working for a year now thank GD! I lost friends that weren't real friends after all obviously! And of course with the loosing friends you always make better ones. I moved to an appartment overlooking the skyline  of NYC! I reconnected with old friends who remain loyal to me. I also started college which was a big decision in my life being that i had to fight with my self and remind my self it doesn't matter what age you are education is always the key. I also decided to put my special skills to good use and i will be creating a few makeup portfolios and the near future and will share the pictures with you.

From what i see now there is some more surprises coming up soon and i pray and hope that they are only good ones!!!

I finally got to see my nephew recently after a year and he is so big! I am surprised how much we can love others besides for ourselves and i don't even have kids yet, wait until i have them!

My dear readers i will try to start writing in my blog more often and would love for you to create your own so we can share anything that is in our thoughts.

Out of my year being away from the spot light all i can say is that tears do dry.